Karla Hernandez

Professor Lewenstein

English 1A

10 April 2018

                                                       Finding Acceptance

Going through a phase were no one accepts you for who you really are is very miserable. In middle school my brother Manie had a hard time being himself. He was constantly bullied by several of his classmates. His classmates would say negative comments such as “faggot” just because the way he would dress and act differently than other boys. There were times were some of his classmates would pull him back from his backpack. And tried to hurt him.  I’ve always been close to my brother I remember like if it was yesterday when he told me about the phase that he was going through he didn’t know what to do. But this horrifying moment made my brother stronger than ever. These days however, Manie is more confident with himself. As a high school student, he now has friends and family that support him and accept him for who he is. In fact, he started to wear more extravagant style clothing. Very fashionable. He’s not ashamed on purchasing women jeans, he feels more comfortable. He always uses these brown boots that are really cute. 

Homophobia is the ignorance about sexual orientation and gender issues. Homophobia not only affects people mentally, but it also affects in a physical way. My brother Manie Mendoza is a strong person that I’ve always looked up to. He went through an obstacle in his life where he felt confused, and lonely. He was afraid to come out to my family including his own friends. Not only did he feel confused, or lonely, but he also had suicidal thoughts. When my brother came out, my parents were surprised they didn’t have a clue of what my brother was going through. Eventually they accepted for who he truly is.  As a sister also supported him because I believe everyone should be accepted. On the other side I happen to have someone in our life who is anti LGBT who happens to be close minded and doesn’t believe in same sex relationships. This hurt my brother in the beginning but that didn’t stop him. My brother made a big decision on coming out so that way he could feel more confident and love himself. As he grew older he realized that no matter how many times he feels discriminated by heterosexual people that won’t stop him from loving himself. Many young LGBT people don’t come out which then leads to depression, but here my loving brother embraced himself. He believes that negative comments make him a stronger person, he really doesn’t care about any comments coming from homophobic people as long as he’s happy with what he’s doing in life. Love is Love.

Society is barely accepting LGBT people because they find it really uncomfortable having them close to them. Many LGBT families or friends change due to the fact their closed one comes out of the closet. It’s  ridiculous how someone can be that hatred towards another human being. Many fail to understand that there isn’t anything wrong with someone being gay, lesbian, bisexual or etc.., Everyone should be more open minded when it comes to liking the same sex.

In the article “How Are LGBT youths affected by discrimination and what can schools do to help?” the writer briefly describes the different types of discrimination LGBT people face. Either at home or school. LGBT people not only get discriminated but also don’t receive the support they should have nor acceptance. About 28% drop out of school because they get bullied either physically or verbally and tend to drop out of school for that reason. On the other hand, many LGBT people don’t receive support from their families because they wouldn’t want to have a “gay” child in their family which many get kicked out of their own house. LGBT people should have a happy and a normal life, which I believe they should. They shouldn’t be treated any different they are just like us. The author believes that in today’s society many young LGBT people commit suicide than heterosexual people. They get teased more often than heterosexual people. In addition, they have a higher risk on consuming drugs and alcohol. In my belief, to get away from life or from getting discriminated by society they start to consume drugs or commit suicide. “LGBT youths remain in the closet and hide”. They rather just not come out to the world than to get discriminated.

I have always been close to my brother, and I did notice a few changes, but I just didn’t believe it. As a senior in high school his life is pretty amazing and has accomplished many things. As I sit in his bed on a late night, I see that he's wearing his favorite brown boots and fashionable outfit. My brother told me “The way I dress defines who truly I am, and I'm not afraid what society has to say” Negative comments do not affect him anymore it makes him feel more confident about himself. Manie believes that “Discriminating someone doesn’t make them any better it makes them look dumb” People are really wasting their time talking bad about others instead about worrying about themselves. When Manie didn’t come out yet to my family I would see that he was always down looking depressed, but he never told anyone what was going on. He looked confused and lost. Until the day came, he talked to my parents about it tears started scrolling down his cheeks. My parents were shocked, but that didn’t change anything my brother still gets treated like my brother. “Overcoming this obstacle in my life made me a better person and learned to love every flaw of myself.” Manie exclaimed with sadness. Up until this day Manie has accomplished many things in life and more to come. 

This is what I believe: tolerance begins at home. We need to teach our kids to respect the differences in people. Parents need to become role models. Kids will learn from their parents, so that way they’re prepared once they get older. They will have more opportunities as they get older either in education, business, or other aspects in life. “Tolerance means respecting and learning from others, valuing differences, bringing cultural gaps, rejecting unfair stereotypes” (Lyness). It is true, tolerance is to respect others for who they are. It needs to be taught by others so that communities would become more diverse.

As I’m speaking to my brother, I noticed that my brother did go through a lot and I just can’t believe he was able to survive this. “It’s like a rollercoaster, there’s ups and downs in my life but that makes me learn a lesson and I don’t regret anything” mentioned Manie. The only thing my brother regrets is keeping it to himself and not letting us know what he was going through. “Being afraid will make things worse, we all have to get out of our bubble at some point. My middle school years were the worse getting bullied for who I truly am sucks.” My brother says that he fucked up there because he could’ve done something about it. He was just really afraid about coming out, he just didn’t want to be treated any different. Manie told me that every LGBT person shouldn’t be afraid to stand out, everyone should be treated equally regardless. There’s nothing wrong with showing who you are. There’s many others that are in the same situation as my brother or maybe worse, but they will get through it.

Coming out was one of Manie’s hardest thing to do. Especially since he was constantly bullied by his classmates, that really hurt his feelings. Listening to all the negative comments people had to say such as “faggot”. Although his life was every challenging he never gave up. He now feels confident and people’s opinions don’t matter to him. Having to go through this phase made him a better person today. Society will always have something to say because they have nothing else to do but to talk my brother told me. Love is the only important thing Discrimination occurs very often either at home, work, or at school. Manie faced it at school. At the moment, he did not know what to do with his life. Manie’s challenging obstacles are relatable to any other LGBT person today. Many are afraid to come out just like Manie was. Manie is now living his life to success. He dresses the way he feels confident enough. He wears those beautiful brown boots. He loves himself every day and can care less about what others have to say.

Works Cited

Dastagir, Alia E. “'Born This Way'? It's Way More Complicated than That.” USA Today, Gannett Satellite Information Network, 25 June 2017, www.usatoday.com/story/news/2017/06/16/born-way-many-lgbt-community-its-way-more-complex/395035001/ (Links to an external site.)Links to an external site..

Green, Emma. “Can States Protect LGBT Rights Without Compromising Religious Freedom?” The Atlantic, Atlantic Media Company, 6 Jan. 2016, www.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2016/01/lgbt-discrimination-protection-states-religion/422730/ (Links to an external site.)Links to an external site..

Rosenberg, Alyssa. “Opinion | In Three Years, LGBT Americans Have Gone from Triumph to Backlash.” The Washington Post, WP Company, 25 Jan. 2018,     www.washingtonpost.com/news/act-four/wp/2018/01/25/in-three-years-lgbt-americans-have-gone-from-triumph-to-backlash-blame-trump/?utm_term=.1ecbf82413fc (Links to an external site.)Links to an external site. (Links to an external site.)Links to an external site..

“How Are LGBT Youths Affected by Discrimination and What Can Schools Do to Help?” York College / CUNY, 31 Mar. 2017, www.york.cuny.edu/academics/writing-program/the-york-scholar-1/volume-5-fall-2008/how-are-lesbian-gay-bisexual-and-transgender-lgbt-youths-affected-by-discrimination-and (Links to an external site.)Links to an external site..

            “Teaching Your Child Tolerance.” Edited by D'Arcy Lyness, KidsHealth, The Nemours Foundation, Mar. 2014, kidshealth.org/en/parents/tolerance.html.